The War on Language

AUSTRALIA has been urged to join a global campaign to declare suicide bombings a crime against humanity.

The Simon Wiesenthal Centre says only an international treaty to counter suicide terrorism would give Australia the legal mechanism to extradite and prosecute, on home soil, inciters of terrorism such as Abu Bakir Bashir, the spiritual leader of Jemaah Islamiah.

The centre's director for international relations, Shimon Samuels, met the Federal Attorney-General, Philip Ruddock, yesterday to seek support for international sanctions against those who sponsor, direct or inspire terrorists.

Labor's defence spokesman, Robert McClelland, has pledged to draft a parliamentary motion and seek bipartisan support for Australia's signing of such a convention. Australia is already a backer of a draft comprehensive convention against terrorism, which has stalled because of problems of defining terrorism.

SMH

Oh I just bet they had problems.

"Ok ok, we'll say it's using force to achieve political ends?"

"Nup, how many Palestinians can we kick out of greater Israel with handholding and protests?"

"Ok, bombing to frighten or threaten people into giving you what you want."

"Does that include from 30,000 feet? Can we make some sort of exception for laser guided bombs?"

"I don't think that's quite in the spirit of..."

"Well look you don't expect us to outlaw killing people and bombing civilians, accidentally of course, heheh, do you?"

"No, no, it's just that..."

"Well good, we'd never get anywhere then. I propose we define it as what our enemies do to us but not what we do to them."

"Well wouldn't that seem a little hypocritical?"

"Hypocritical? Just wait till we get it declared a crime against humanity..."

"A crime against what!?"

"A crime against humanity, you know, like forcibly deporting entire populations and deliberately targetting civilians in retaliation, you'll have to get it past the UN though, we have a little issue with them about their resolutions. They resolve, we don't follow, yadda yadda, no big deal."

"Um, well.. I er... how about Nazis, shouldn't we outlaw being a Nazi?"

"What? Why? What for?"

"I just thought it was more important than..."

"Than terrorism!? Are you insane?"